Category Archives: planning tips

{Planning Tips} Top 5 Tips for a Perfect Honeymoon + 15 Honeymoon Must-Haves

By Chandra Fredrick | Jul 19

5 Tips for a Perfect Honeymoon (plus 15 must-haves) from Oh Lovely Day

Well a travel week wouldn’t be complete without a honeymoon post, am I right? So today I’m giving you my Top 5 Tips to the Perfect Honeymoon.

{Go somewhere you really want to go}
Sit down with your significant other and think about the kind of trip you want to take. Do you just want to lay on a beach the whole time, or do you want to do a lot of sightseeing? Do you want to visit a far off location, or take a road trip? My husband and I had already been to Hawaii a few times and always wanted to visit Italy, so we figured out a way to make that happen for our honeymoon. All that really matters is you are away, somewhere you like, and with each other!

tips for a perfect honeymoon from Oh Lovely Day

{Consider a honeymoon registry}
Sometimes after having a wedding, there isn’t much left in the budget to pay for a honeymoon. That’s why my husband and I did a honeymoon registry in addition to a traditional registry. Our guests loved it and really got into buying us something that we could enjoy (dinner, a gondola ride, tickets to a museum, a bottle of wine). There are great companies out there, like Lovely Vendor Guide member Honeymoon Pixie, who allow you to personalize the registry and get the info out to your guests. I highly recommend a honeymoon registry and had a terrific experience with ours!

{Bring lots of clothing options without overpacking}
We always think we should pack light, and then end up overpacking while somehow never having anything good to wear (is that just me, because this always happens to me!). So I’ve rounded up some adorable, budget friendly dresses that would be perfect for a warm weather honeymoon. And one or two great pairs of shoes (think wedges and strappy sandals) would work for every one of these. So you can pack several dresses but only one pair of shoes to make up for it!

tips for a perfect honeymoon from Oh Lovely Day | dress options

{all dresses via modcloth}

I rounded all of these options up from Modcloth, but other great sources for cute & budget friendly dresses are Asos, Old Navy (I have had great luck with them this season!), Forever 21, Zara, or a J.Crew sale.

{Bring the necessities}
Besides clothes (and a few pieces of pretty lingerie) you need to bring the things that are necessities for a great trip. Here are a few things that I think are must-haves for your honeymoon:

tips for a perfect honeymoon from Oh Lovely Day | 15 travel must-haves

1. Contraception (unless you’re ready to get preggo right away!)

2. Sleep aid for long flights: I popped an ambien and slept for 7 hours on our way to Paris. It was
amazing. But there are over the counter sleep aids that you can try as well. Obviously talk to your
doctor first.

3. An iPod, or the earphones for your iPhone or iPad, to drown out plane noise.

4. If you are a light sleeper like I am, I would also recommend a white noise app for the same device,
because you know hotels are always noisy…This is the free one I use when we travel.

5. If you are going to be staying in one destination, a travel pillow is a huge help on flights. But if you
are traveling all over Europe, you won’t want to drag one along.

6. A backpack that your husband will carry…so you don’t have to!

7. Paper soap: if you are going on a long trip and don’t want to pack a million pairs of underwear,
and won’t have access to a laundering service, these are a must!

8. A travel luggage scale will keep you from paying huge fees on heavy luggage. They are small and
lightweight and super easy to use.

9. Downy Wrinkle Release: this will get the packing wrinkles out of your clothes and it comes in a
travel size. I’m also a huge fan of the Tide-to-go stain pen!

10. Evian Facial Spray: Get a quick refresh while on a long flight without messing your makeup.

11. A universal adapter is great to have for international travel, and this one works for all
destinations.

12. This is one I wish I knew about for my honeymoon – the Vinni Wine bag lets you safely transport
wine, or other glass souvenirs, in your luggage. I would have filled a suitcase with wine and this
delicious balsamic vinigrette had I known about this!

13. A camera, obviously. And pair it with….

14. My most favorite of the must-haves: The XShot screws into the bottom of
your camera and has an extender that allows you to take self photos without it being seen. It is
GENIUS! My husband and I used this on our honeymoon and yes, we got funny looks. But we
didn’t have to worry about asking (in another language) and trusting someone to take a picture for
us. And it folds up small enough to fit in your husband’s cargo shorts-type pocket. We have so
many great pictures of the two of us all over Paris and Italy thanks to it. Here’s one where the
XShot slipped in a bit (and notice the backpack too!) but I swear out of like 1000 pics we took,
these are the only two were the XShot showed up.

honeymoon must-haves | the XShot extender for self photo taking

15. The last must-have isn’t actually something that I’ve ever tried, but when I heard of it I thought it
sounded brilliant and super weird at the same time. But having been in a undesirable bathroom (or
lack of) situation before, I think it is worth a try. It is called the GoGirl (that’s what I said) and it
basically lets women pee standing up. I’ll let you check it out to learn the rest. Can someone tell
me if they have tried this, or try it out and fill me in? I’m intrigued and weirded out, but mostly
intrigued…

{Unplug, relax, and enjoy!}

This one is pretty self-explanatory, but unplugging is harder than you think it will be (it is much easier if you are out of the country). Leave your phone in the hotel room, turn it off, or let your battery die. Leave your laptop and iPad at home. We only checked our email a couple times in two weeks, and never used a phone. It was heaven.

One last thing, the Knot has a pretty extensive packing list to help you as a checklist when your packing time has come. You can find it here.

I hope this helps you in planning, packing, and enjoying your honeymoon! This post has given me the travel bug, so let me live vicariously through you. Tell me, where are you going (or where did you go) on your honeymoon?

4 Comments

{Planning Tips} Show Me the Money: Who Pays for What?

By Chandra Fredrick | Jul 12

Ok, so let me preface this post by saying that these days no one is expected to pay for anything and anyone can pay for anything when it comes to weddings. That being said, there are things that, traditionally, are assigned to the bride, groom, bride’s family, or groom’s family. I’ve compiled a list to help you, and maybe to use to facilitate the conversation on who will pay for what in your wedding and what your budget should be.

tips and info on who pays for what in weddings by oh lovely day

{via etsy}

{Bride Pays For}
Groom’s ring  ~ Gifts for your bridesmaids  ~ A wedding gift for your groom  ~ A gift for your parents    ~ Your own hair & make-up for the wedding

{via style me pretty}

{Bride’s Family Pays For}
Save the Dates, Invitations, Programs, Menus, and other paper goods  ~ Wedding gown & bridal accessories   ~ Feeding you and your bridesmaids on the wedding day  ~ Bridesmaid’s bouquets   ~ All fees associated with the ceremony site rental and decor AND the reception site rental and decor  ~ Florals used for decor ~ Food for the reception   ~ All Wedding Vendors (photographer, cinematographer, planner, band or DJ, etc.) ~ Wedding cake  ~ Favors  ~ Transportation for the you, your wedding party and your family to the wedding  ~ Gratuities for any vendors ~ Post-wedding brunch, if you have one … So basically, almost everything. (but again, this is only traditionally and really varies these days)

{via Ruffled}

{Groom Pays For}
Engagement and wedding ring for the bride  ~ Bridal bouquet  ~ A wedding gift for the bride ~ Gifts for the groomsmen ~ Boutonnieres for all men in the wedding party or families ~ A gift for his parents  ~ Cost of the marriage license  ~ Officiant’s fees  ~ His attire & accessories  ~ Ties & accessories for men in the party  ~ Honeymoon  ~ Transportation for bride & groom at the end of the night  ~Accommodations for the wedding night

{jose villa}

{Groom’s Family Pays For}
Rehearsal dinner  ~ Their own wedding attire  ~ Their own travel expenses  & accommodations ~ Transportation for groom & groomsmen to the ceremony  ~ Bar & Beverages at reception

{w. scott chester}

{Wedding Party Pays For}
Bachelor & bachelorette parties  ~ Bridal shower, if hosting  ~ A wedding gift for the couple (yep, you’re still supposed to get them a gift)  ~ Their travel expenses  ~ Attire (dress, shoes, jewelry, suit or tuxedo purchase or rental, and accessories, and for flower girls & ring bearers – their parents pay for their own attire) ~ make-up and hair on wedding day if the opt to have it done, unless the bride pays as their gift

Again, let me stress that this is not a hard-fast rule. These decisions will vary and should take into account everyone’s financial abilities. If you and your husband can bear more of the financial burden you may decide to do that. If the groom’s parents wish to contribute more than the booze, that is totally fine. If the bride’s family can’t pay for all of the listed things, they don’t have to. Remember that with the money comes the understanding of more involvement and decision-making. Your parents may not expect that, but it is customary that those who pay have more say.

As I told you in my tips for what to do when you get engaged, you should talk to your significant other about what kind of wedding you want, what you can afford to spend yourselves, and then talk to your families. My husband and I talked to our own parents seperately and solo, as we were more comfortable doing that. I think talking to both families at the same time will make the other feel uncomfortable and pressured. We didn’t even tell each side of our family what the other was contributing, so one side wouldn’t feel bad or less helpful.

So what do you think? Do you agree with the traditional idea of who pays for what? Did you and your honey do things differently? Do you have any advice for how to discuss this with your families?

2 Comments

{DIY + Planning Tips} Welcome Bags for Out of Town Guests + Essentials to Put in Them

By Chandra Fredrick | Jul 3

Today’s feature is a two-for-one! I’ve got a DIY for you to make your own out-of-town welcome bags, and then I’ve got a planning tip: what to put in them. I think this is often an afterthought for brides, but an area where you can make your guests (especially those who have traveled and spent money & effort to attend your wedding) feel appreciated!

I’ve been to a lot of weddings. AAAAA LOT! And as an out-of-town guest, I have always appreciated a good welcome bag. So when I was planning my wedding and knew a majority of our guests were coming to California from all over, I vowed to make them as comfortable as possible.

I wanted to make my welcome bag a little more personal than the generic brown or colored paper bag with a couple of things thrown in. I wanted them to include what I believe are necessities. And I wanted them to be easy and inexpensive for me.

{The DIY}

Materials for the bags:

1. Canvas tote bags for each out-of-town guest or couple (from cheaptotes)
2. Iron-on printer paper (from an office supply store like office depot)
3. An iron
4. A printer
5. An image or design to print

We had a monogram that we included on our save-the-dates, invitation suite, and other wedding details, and I wanted to put in on our welcome bags. I had to reverse the image so that when it was printed and ironed on it would read correctly.

Instructions:

1. Print a coordinating number of your image/design as you have totes.
2. Using a hard surface (a table works well- an ironing board does not), follow the directions on the transfer paper packaging to iron on your image. I laid an old pillow case down on the table, put the tote on top of that, and placed the printed paper where I wanted it on the tote. Then I ironed each image on until I had done enough totes for everyone, plus a few extras to be safe.

{The Planning Tips}

Next you have to fill the bags. Here are what I consider essentials:

1. 2 bottles of water (this is the most important thing, and one bottle is NOT enough unless the bag is for only one person!)

2. Snacks (in ours I included special K cereal bars, a bag of chips or crackers, and a small bag of Isabella’s Cookies, which are made where we had our wedding and are my absolute fave!)

3. Hangover helpers (tums, advil, etc.)

4. A map of the area, activities, & restaurant recommendations

5. Mints or gum

6. An itinerary of events, including any shuttle departure times (if applicable)

7. Sunscreen (if in a beachy area)

Here is a picture of our finished product, complete with itinerary and other items with our monogram:

Total approximate cost per bag (including the stuff inside) = $6

Making your guests feel welcomed, comfortable, informed, and hydrated = priceless!

Has anyone else done their own DIY welcome bags? Do you have any things you think should be included in them that I didn’t mention? Let’s make a running list in the comments to help planning brides!

And if you’re around tomorrow, come by and see a fabulous red & blue real wedding just for July 4th!

{Real Engagement} Chandra & Jonathan: Modern Portraits + Fun at the Beach, Plus 5 Tips For a Great Engagement Session

By Chandra Fredrick | Jul 1

Many of you have asked to see my engagement photos and I hesitated posting them. I just didn’t want to be all “here, look at pictures of me!” I shared my wedding because it is the whole reason this blog exists but I felt like posting my e-session was different. But the other day I was looking at a couple of our engagement photos, realizing how different I look, how much milage 4 1/2 years and one baby can put on you. But I also realized that our engagement photos are still relevant, fresh, and timeless. No trends for the sake of trend, just us, at places we love, being ourselves: what I think an engagement session should be. And although a lot of time has gone by, I can remember those feelings and that time like it was yesterday.

{Part I}

We did some portraits at the Viceroy Hotel in Santa Monica, because I’ve always loved the style and decor – it is very ‘me.’ The yellow chairs, the plate wall, the mirrors: it is the perfect combination of vintage and modern influences, and makes for some great pictures.

{Part II}

Since moving to California four years before, we’ve always loved the beach. We were starting our life together, and eventually our family, in California. What better place to have our engagement pictures than the beach and pier in Santa Monica. So after our portraits at the Viceroy, we headed for the beach and had some fun!

{photos by Jennifer Roper}

So if I could take this opportunity to give a few tips on what I think makes a great engagement session, it would be these:

1. Pick a place you love and that has meaning to you for at least some of your photos.

2. Get outside if possible – the light is always so much better!

3. Base your wardrobe on what your style is, what you are comfortable in, and something that isn’t so trendy that when looking back on your photos you’ll be able to place the year based on the clothes alone.

4. Don’t do something that isn’t you just because it is trendy or popular. If you have never had a picnic as a couple, do not have a vintage picnic e-session just because you’ve seen 100 of them!

5. Relax and try to have fun. And if you need a little help, have a drink first! We had a drink or two at the Viceroy bar before we started just to loosen up a bit.

Hope you enjoyed the little walk down memory lane with me and that you find the tips helpful. Thanks for indulging me the glimpse back in time.

8 Comments

{Planning Tips} Finding Your Wedding Venue: Tips, Questions to Ask, & A Cautionary Tale

By Chandra Fredrick | Jun 28

Last week I talked about the five things you should do first when you get engaged. I also told you that finding your venue can be one of the most important, and hardest, parts of planning. So today I’m going to give you some tips to finding your wedding venue. My first two quick pieces of advice: there is no perfect venue and being open to any date will help you have more options.

{original photo post}

Some questions you need to ask yourself when looking for a venue:

1. Do you want to get married in a church or religious location? (because this automatically means to need two locations)
2. Do you want your ceremony and reception to be in one location? (this is often more affordable and convenient)
3. How many guests will you be having?
4. What time of year will you be getting married?
5. What geographical location will you be getting married?

Once you have decided as a couple that you want a summer wedding, or an outdoor wedding, or a church wedding, or a destination wedding, you have a better idea of how to narrow down your venue search!

{original photo post}

Once you know what you’re looking for, you need to find some locations to visit. Some great resources can be:

1. Ask married friends who have gotten married in the same place. They may have done a venue search and can recommend some places or tell you places to avoid.
2. Look online. You can go a google search for your area, look on sites like The Knot or Wedding Wire, and check out vendor guides on wedding blogs for ideas.
3. If you’re in a larger area buy a wedding magazine specific to that area, like The Knot Southern California, which has ads and listings for local venues.

{original photo post}

Once you find a few venues you want to visit, here are some questions that you might not think of that are VERY important to ask:

1. Do you have a cut off time or a time limit? Lots of places make you cut off the music by 10 pm or give you 4 hours for your reeption, and if you want to party to the wee hours this is important to you.
2. Do you cater on site, have rentals, etc. or do we have to bring everything on site ourselves?
3. What is the parking like for your guests?
4. What are the bathrooms like for your guests? (this is important! you don’t want porto-potties for your guests right?)
5. Can I bring my own alcohol on site? (this is a gem and can save you a lot of money)
6. Where will the guests eat, dance, have cocktail hour, sit for the reception (if applicable)? You want to be sure there is room for the number of guests you have in mind at each location.
7. Can we use any vendors we want? Do you have any vendor requirements or restrictions?
8. What are the extra fees or hidden costs? Sometimes ceremonies cost extra. There is a fee if you go over a certain number of people.
9. Do you have a minimum cost that we must meet? Many venues do, and while they are usually easy to meet, if the minimum is $20,000 and that is more than your budget, that is not the venue for you.
10. What other restrictions do you have, if any? Some of these could be a noise restriction (could prevent you from having the band or DJ you want), decoration restrictions, etc.

These ten questions will help you narrow down your venue choices to find the right one for you.

And now, a quick cautionary tale: When my husband and I were looking for our Southern California wedding venue we visited a place in Malibu that we had heard great things about and where a friend had actually held their wedding. We visited the property, loved the reception area, and thought it might be perfect. Then we asked to see the possible ceremony sites, the most popular taking place under a big tree. But when we walked over ourselves in person, we quickly realized there was a sewer or water drain off to the ocean nearby, and the whole area smelled horribly! Like, bog of eternal stench smelly! The thought of saying my vows under the stench of poo turned me off immediately, and we crossed that venue off our list. Can you imagine? So the lesson here is walk around the whole property where you or your guests will be. And if possible, do it at the time of year (if you are marrying a year later) because somethings aren’t a problem in the fall but are a major problem in the summer (like the smell of poo!).

I hope these tips will help you to find your wedding venue. And remember, no venue is perfect! But there is one out there that will feel right for you. You’ll find it, I promise!

5 Comments

{Planning Tips} I’m Engaged! Now What? The Five Things To Do First

By Chandra Fredrick | Jun 21

Welcome to our first official Planning Tips feature (although I have done many planning tips features in the past, they just weren’t “official” per this new schedule I’m trying out). I’m really excited to do this weekly feature, because I feel like as a former bride and wedding blogger I can really help with some of the logistical, practical, planning type of things that the newly engaged have no idea about. I know I didn’t! And I’m also taking reader questions, so if you have a problem or a planning question you need help with, please leave a comment or email me and I’ll try to answer it during one of these weekly features. First up, I’m sharing the five things you should do first when you get engaged.

{photo by Jennifer Roper}

{one} set a budget
After you call your parents and friends to share the news and celebrate your newly engaged bliss, the first thing you need to do is set a budget. This will determine everything else you do, decide on, and choose. Are you paying for the wedding yourselves or will your parents contribute? How much will be contributed? The best thing you can do is figure this out before anything else, and then stick to your budget.

{two} make a guest list
Each of you should make a list of who you would like to invite, and you may want to let each of your parents do the same (especially if they are footing the bill!) Then you’ll have an anxiety attack when you add them all up to 500 people! Trust me when I say that this will not be your real guest list. You will cut cut cut until you reach a more realistic number. This can be hard when you include everyone’s friends, family members, work colleagues, and your mother-in-law’s second cousin twice removed. So set rules: no extended family (meaning parents, grandparents, aunts & uncles, and first cousins only), no people from work, no kids: these are a few ways to cut the list if you are comfortable with it. And this is just a starting point to give you a good idea. You can always add or subtract as needed. REMEMBER – THE MORE PEOPLE YOU HAVE, THE MORE MONEY YOUR WEDDING WILL COST. This is why step one is so important!

{three} find a venue
Warning: for me, this was the hardest and most stressful part of wedding planning. Finding a venue that meets your budget, finding a venue that fits your guest list, finding a venue that doesn’t make you cut off the music at a ridiculously early hour, finding a venue that isn’t booked for two years… these are just a few of many frustrating parts of your venue search. My husband and I also really wanted to get married on a particular date, and this made our search hard as well. Once we let that go, the possibilites opened up for us. That’s why I didn’t say “pick a date.” It is much better to be open to any date in the month or two you prefer to be married. Once you find a venue you love in a location you love that works with your budget and guest count, the hardest part of your wedding planning is behind you!

{four} think about your wedding style
Let me repeat, THINK about your wedding style. Don’t decide on ANYTHING. You will change your mind 500 times. Also, repeat after me: I WILL NOT BUY ANYTHING YET. You will change your mind, and have wasted your money (learn from my mistakes!) Just start looking at some wedding blogs, pick up the latest Martha Stewart Weddings, look around your home (because your wedding style should reflect YOU and what YOU love), bundle things on lover.ly, create a pinterest board, and start thinking.

{five} take a breath and relax
Once you have gotten the big things out of the way, stop planning for a little bit (depending on how far away your wedding date is). Getting wrapped up in the planning can get you frustrated, scare and confuse your soon-to-be groom, and get overwhelming real quick. Having a budget, an idea of your guest list, a venue (and therefore a wedding date), and thinking about your style is enough for now. Although every city and location is different and demand for other wedding vendors is higher in some places than others, everyone should have a little breather before you move on to the rest of your planning. Enjoy being engaged. Celebrate. Go on a date and don’t talk about the wedding. It is refreshing!

While these are the first 5 things you should do, you may also want to start looking at vendors you like when you are perusing the wedding blogs. Many of us (me included) have vendor guides to help you. Plus, at the end of every wedding feature all of the vendors are listed, so if the feature is in your area and you like the photographs or florals from that wedding, you may want to consider those vendors.

So tell me, who out there is planning a wedding right now? Are you just starting or well into the planning? Do any of you disagree with these tips or have others you think should come first? Do you have any questions you need answered or areas you would like to hear tips for? Let me know!